There’s no way you could possibly get pregnant from having anal, right? I mean, some women do it in the butt just to prevent getting stuck with a round bump. Welp, think again! Women’s Health Magazine just shut down everything we’ve been learning about sex and the female body since our days of sneaking and watching porn as preteens.
Apparently, there’s a one in a million chance that a woman can bake a bun from getting some in her bum, says Dr. Brian Steixner, M.D., whose a urologist with the Jersey Urology Group in Atlantic City. And according to a story he told Women’s Health, he just so happened to witness that special “one” while studying in med school.
Late one night, a young, pregnant woman came into the emergency room complaining about spotting. Now, if you know anything about pregnant women, you know that spotting is a common thing when chicks carry chicklets. But this woman was bleeding from her rear, and well, that’s kinda, sorta not normal.
As it turns out, this woman was born with cloacal malformation, an extremely rare condition where women are born without a urethra, vagina and anus, but have only one hole, referred to as the cloaca. The deformity is usually corrected at birth so that the baby has a separate vagina, anus and urethra.
This particular women underwent the surgery, but obviously, something just ain’t go right. Either the surgery was botched, or the trauma of the procedure caused her body to form a fistula (an abnormal connection between organs) and her rectum merged with her uterus. So every bloody month when Aunt Flo came to town, she was leaking from her rootie tootie instead of her coot—you get the point.
After doing some digging, Dr. Steixner learned that the young lady had anal sex prior to getting knocked up. Aha! Little Miss Lady conceived a child through doing the nasty in the nasty. Well, a few months later, doctors performed a C-section (I’m quite sure they didn’t want her to poop the little slugger out) and she welcomed a healthy little baby into the world.
Although this is some craaazzzzy sh*t (pun intended), Dr. Steixner believes that the woman would not have gotten pregnant through her pooper had the surgery to correct her cloacal malformation been successful, but explained that the procedure is a difficult task.
“Building the walls to separate the three passages [the urethra, vagina, and rectum] is delicate work,” he said. “The longer the walls need to be built, the closer surgeons get to the urethral and anal sphincters. Some women suffer from leakage of urine and stool their entire lives. It’s a huge psychological and quality of life issue.”
And in case you’re wondering, woman born with this condition may be all twisted up on the inside, but look perfectly normal down under. (Interesting stuff, I know.) We learn something new everyday!